When Life Feels Like You’re Standing Still | Wisdom Conversation

speaker-1 (00:00) So it's all but the feeling that I had losed the meaning of the life. I explain more. speaker-0 (00:13) Okay, thank you. speaker-1 (00:14) So studying and I come back home. I go working and I go and then come back home. So it's a daily routine. So my life became born. speaker-0 (00:28) Yes. speaker-1 (00:30) Then I used to practice a sport to win a die and changing my style life. But I think I'm still in the zone comfort zone. speaker-0 (00:45) Yes. speaker-1 (00:48) So what size should I do? speaker-0 (00:50) Well what's it all for Yeah, what's it all for? What is all this for? What is what is you going to work all for? What is you studying all for? What is the sport all for? Where what is it for? speaker-1 (01:08) To life, to live, sorry. speaker-0 (01:11) That's what you're doing. You're just living life. You're not going anywhere. You're not going anywhere. You're just standing still. You're running you're running on the spot. You're working on the spot. You're studying on the spot. You're not going anywhere. You're it's boring. speaker-1 (01:30) That's the problem. speaker-0 (01:31) That is the problem. So let let's decide where we want to go with all this. What do we want out of life? Let's not just expect life to give us because it won't, because it's quite happy to have you sit standing on the spot working on the spot. speaker-1 (01:48) So how it's work. speaker-0 (01:50) What do you what do you have you ever asked yourself, where what do I want out of life? speaker-1 (01:57) So I when I was studying I was walking I was searching for work. So now I'm working. speaker-0 (02:04) No no no no no no that that's just out of necessity. That's literally to be able to put a roof over your head and food in your mouth. That isn't that isn't what are your dream what when you were younger, what did you get excited about? What really, you know, you thought, wow, this is you know, or you saw someone or you're inspired by someone. What was it? speaker-1 (02:27) I have many dreams. speaker-0 (02:29) Great. Great. Okay. So let's put the many dreams into a list of order of things. What what would have been the top? speaker-1 (02:40) Traveling maybe speaker-0 (02:42) Maybe? Why maybe? speaker-1 (02:44) Because we don't have enough money. speaker-0 (02:48) No, no, no, no, no. There's there's another thing when you set goals, when you have dreams, you can't look at where you are now. Because when you have a goal, when you have a dream, you start moving away from where you are. So, and you having this vision, having this goal, will move one foot in front of the other, and you will start moving out of your comfort zone, and it's gonna feel scary. But you you and you will decide what you want to take with you from your current situation. But that isn't gonna be you tomorrow, and that's not gonna be you in the next day because now you've decided where you're going. It's like you deciding I'm going on a trip. And I'm gonna go there, over there, I'm gonna I'm gonna have to walk to the station, I will have to take a car to the airport, I will have to take. An aeroplane to the country. That takes you walking forward. So every step you take, you won't be in the same place as yesterday, will you? Because you have started your journey. And that's what you're doing when you set yourself a goal. You start moving forward. speaker-1 (04:05) So I have to start moving for a route. speaker-0 (04:08) No, you have you have to start by making sure that where are we going? Where are we going on this life's journey? Where what what is the goal? What do I want out of life? speaker-1 (04:19) Yeah, so speaker-0 (04:20) So literally and if there's loads of goals, put them in order. Let's put the most outlandish one right at the end. That's where ultimately that would be the best goal ever in my life. And then speaker-1 (04:34) when we try and it's ca became so hard. And sometimes we don we fail. speaker-0 (04:41) Who has that happened to you? speaker-1 (04:44) Yeah. speaker-0 (04:46) And how why was that? speaker-1 (04:49) Because a lot of factory though I tried, but speaker-0 (04:55) And that that that's the thing. Your mind is playing games with you. It won it doesn't want to go. It doesn't want to go. It's trying to keep you safe because it's coming up with that narrative of saying, we tried. We tried. But did you try? Did you really try? Did you speak to someone like me? Was there some That's the thing. So these circumstances have changed. And also, when you tried, how long ago was it? And did you have the right tools in place to make you move forward? Were you prepared? Did speaker-1 (05:32) A lot of things. speaker-0 (05:34) Absolutely. It's not just one thing, it's it's a whole combination of things. So basically what I'm saying is you take the first step by writing all your goals down. Did you do that last time? speaker-1 (05:45) So I have a notebook wh I I plan all my plan in the whole year and when I check something, maybe how to speak it. When I achieve something, I cross the line. Okay? So speaker-0 (06:10) Mm-hmm. speaker-1 (06:12) it can be basic, those things. speaker-0 (06:15) It can be basic. It can be just so you are able to move forward. So you get excited about waking up in the morning and thinking about those goals and like you know, life can throw anything at me, but I'm still looking at my goal. Anything that comes in my way, I'm gonna walk round it, I'm gonna climb over it and I or I'm gonna bash through it. But I still am focused on the goal. That's where I'm going. So bring it on. And you keep you keep focused and you keep learning. And also learn about yourself because by you learning about yourself, because you're the only person is that's able to take one step forward at a time. And you're the only one that's gonna fail. speaker-1 (07:01) True. So for you I have to be excited to mind. speaker-0 (07:05) It absolutely. Otherwise those goals won't won't won't come into play. Why not why would why would you head for a goal that you're not excited about? speaker-1 (07:15) I have to try. speaker-0 (07:16) Because if you're not excited, life's gonna throw something at you and go, yeah, that looks more interesting and then you're distracted, you go somewhere else and it's like, Why did I even go that way? speaker-1 (07:28) True. Maybe our mind tell tell us to do something. speaker-0 (07:36) Exactly, it will. It will. But you have to be the master of your mind. And that's part of the journey is to start being the boss and not listen to this because this isn't you. This was your programming from an early age. This is your parents' views. These are your community views. This is your educational views. This is the experience that you experienced when you were a young child. speaker-1 (08:01) Yeah, it's totally bad. speaker-0 (08:02) And you've and you've basically been running on that until now, when you've literally come on this show and you went, Enough's enough. I can't carry on the way I am. So you have to understand that we need to start reprogramming this. We have to be the master and that we don't have to act to whatever it says. We have to be the questioner. Where why are you thinking that? You know, I I don't feel it. Or I'm gonna question that. I'm gonna go completely the opposite way. I'm not gonna listen to this. speaker-1 (08:36) Okay, so we have to change our minds. speaker-0 (08:39) Absolutely. We have to and we have to listen deeper, deeper. The more you start being in control of this and the more you can listen past that to this, then You can move forward. speaker-1 (08:55) Yes. So it's the first step. I think I will change. Well, what do you think? I can speaker-0 (09:07) Yes, I would I would write your goals down on a piece of paper and put the the most exciting one at the top and listen to the voice. When you put the most exciting one at the top, what will it say? no, that's not gonna work. And go, interesting. Yeah, thank you for showing up because that isn't the way I'm thinking. I put that at the top because there's a reason for me putting it at the top because that really gets me excited. That gets gets everything. Really passionate and that's what I need as a driving force moving forward. If you're saying, no, we tried that already, no, that's n that's gonna fail, you're not helping. You're not helping. So I am gonna put a list of importance and then I'm gonna start this journey and you know take one at a time. If that's the case, I'm gonna take one step at a time and then I'll I'll take one goal at a time and I'll prove you wrong. Because I can do this. speaker-1 (10:08) Yes. in the in the past I had I had done li to do list and I was organized in the day. But I'm talking about achieving our goals to futures, not not daily. speaker-0 (10:27) No, exactly. You've got to be careful with that to do list. That to do list could be a distraction. Make sure that to do list is relevant to achieving your goals. You know, if you have a to do list, make sure that you know the ones that you do are focused on you moving forward and stepping closer to your goals, not the ones that you don't need to do. speaker-1 (10:51) Okay, so f so if I have to do steps. First step is to do a a list of our goal of my goal. speaker-0 (11:00) Yes, because at the moment it's all up here and it's all jumbled up. We we should put it down on a piece of paper and see what's relevant, which are the ones that we really wanna achieve. speaker-1 (11:10) I am the second one. speaker-0 (11:13) The second one is to be the master of this because speaker-1 (11:17) Okay. speaker-0 (11:18) you don't and also look at the people around you. Do you have supporters for you moving forward or do you have people that drain your energy and just want to hold you back? speaker-1 (11:29) Ray my ener my energy and hold me back. speaker-0 (11:32) Because that's important because you need all the energy on this journey. And you need and you need a support network to get you to your goals. speaker-1 (11:42) Okay. I have to change my area. speaker-0 (11:46) Well, this is it. Now you're more aware. Now you're looking at you're looking at this as a journey. You're looking at this as you moving forward. And you don't need hangers honors because they're just going to pull you back. Also, you need to start looking at the words that you say because they're a reflection on where you are. So if if you hear yourself say but, can't, impossible, they're the ones that are holding you back. So you've got to change the narrative of like, I will, I'm going to. Th this is where I'm going. speaker-1 (12:17) So I have to be positive to have a feedback positive. speaker-0 (12:21) Yeah, and if anything comes in your way, don't look at it as I failed, look at it as a challenge to get over it, to keep moving, keep positive, keep fo focusing on your goal. speaker-1 (12:33) Okay. So I have to be optimist. speaker-0 (12:37) Yeah, this isn't gonna be an easy thing. It's you checking in every single day. It's you being the master of your journey. speaker-1 (12:54) Thanks for all this, it's more helpful. speaker-0 (12:57) Well, I'm here as your supporter, so I'm here every single day. So if you ever feel like you're wobbling or if you ever feel like you've stopped, please come back. speaker-1 (13:08) You very much. I will. speaker-0 (13:10) All right. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Right. speaker-1 (13:13) Fala. Thank you. speaker-0 (13:14) Take care. Bye bye. When someone shows up like that, I know they're on the right path because they're they're questioning where they are, how they got there. And they know now that they have to start taking control of their life journey, that they can't just carry on the way they are because they just seem to be standing still. As she said, just standing still. Everything seems boring because there's nowhere to go. It's just like I'm static. The programming has only got me here and now I just don't know where I'm going. I just don't know what I want. And that's where we have to start tuning in. We have to sh start making goals for ourselves so we can move forward, so we can get ourselves out of that comfort zone.